ICM'S Exclusive Study Of MankindYear One: We came on to Earth. Ah, a nice planet soon to be invaded with greed, pollution, and violence. And bacon.
(Let's skip a few years at random points, shall we?)
Ice Age: Earth freezes over while a squirrel tries desperately to eat an acorn.
Dark Ages: Knights fight in a bloodbath to the death, but it's just a flesh wound.
1812: A big war was said to happen now, but it actually happened in 1813. 1812 just sounds better.
1900: Cars are invented! This is also when they probably invented Carbon Monoxide.
1901: Dr. Seuss was born this year.
He wrote us books about things we would fear.
Don't deny it! What would you do
If a huge cat came in your house and your fish started talking, too?
1912: The "unsinkable" ship sank. That's irony for ya, folks.
1920's: The Three Stooges came out sometime in this period. Scrap Star Wars technology, Three Stooges should be the next warfare thing.
1925: Charles Schulz! Good grief, I really need to get further or this'll be a long article....
1928: I skipped to the most crucial thing on this timeline that happened early on: Mickey Mouse!
1930: What's up, doc? Looney Tunes came out to rival Mickey...
1930's: The great depression. We struggled to get out of this period, and a few decades later we're back in it and the government doesn't give a fart in the wind.
1931: Smile, Darn Ya Smile was the name of this cheerful Looney Tunes cartoon to come out. The song would later be ToonTown's theme in Roger Rabbit's movie.
1941: Archie Andrews: a typical teenager who's principal doesn't try to help him, has two girlfriends, and a best pal who eats burgers nonstop and has no diabetes. Yeah, real typical.
1950: Peanuts! Need I say more about THE best comic strip?
1952: MAD Magazine! Other media would lie to us about USA's state, but MAD speaks the truth.
1960: Family Circus ran with a dotted-line onto our comics page and is still here!
1969: Woodstock, and it ain't the bird I'm talking about.
1970's: Weird Al sang famously first in 1976, and has been super mega awesome since and is still going strong!
1971: Ziggy: If you've ever been to a Hallmark store, you've seen him.
1976: Garfield: If you exist, you've seen him.
1980: Pac-Man. It's a wonder he isn't possessed after eating all those ghosts.
1980's: The Back To The Future Saga. Great Scott, I know it came out in 1985 but that spot on this timeline is taken by Italian plumbers.
1981: Donkey Kong. Expert players still look like idiots today when they mindlessly toddle into a barrel.
1985: Super Mario Brothers! We still play it to this day and nobody can remember Green-er, Luigi's name.
1988: Who Framed Roger Rabbit! Don't disagree: it's the best movie ever.
1990's: Big Nate, the awesome comic strip rival to the Wimpy Kid, came out. Yes, all the way back then!
1991: When Mario had the gaming world for years, a certain blue hedgehog named Sonic ran (literally) in to rival him...
1995: Toy Story came out: A wonderful movie which makes it so that you can't help but feel your toys are alive and watching you.
1999: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Spongebob Squarepants!
2000: Peanuts ended and Charles Schulz died. Who knew a new century could start off so sadly?
2006: Sonic celebrated his 15th birthday with Sonic 06, the worst game he's ever done. Why was it so bad? It wasn't even finished when it was released! (Long story.) Don't worry, Sonic, you'll make much more amazing games soon. Trust me...
2012: Near the end of the year, comic strip Baraler launched on the internet! It's still a webcomic with hopes to be in the newspapers soon...
2013: Not much progress from Year One.