Tuesday, April 30, 2013

The World's Dumbest Video Games

Today, we will look at the world's most idiotic video games.

Sonic's Schoolhouse (1996)

What do you get when an awesome character has become super successful over only SIX YEARS?! Amazing! His popularity has only grown from 1991-1996, so a celebration is in order. Only the celebration is LEARNING.

Sonic is driving a schoolbus in an orderly fashion, as opposed to running the kids to school like he's supposed to.
The graphics were early 3D (look at how shiny they were), and that's just the worst idea for a video game ever.
Sonic Schoolhouse
"Hey, kids! Let's do some radical algebra! Way past cool!"

Pokemon Red/Blue, First Release, Japan Only (About 1996)

Actually, the only thing wrong with this game is a town called "Lavender Town". If you were under 13 and listened to the music with headphones, the music would cause your ears to bleed, or, at worst, make you kill yourself.
Nintendo claimed they knew nothing about it. Why? The music was a glitch, and it doesn't affect adults.
It just sounds annoying to them.
Really annoying.
Like, really.

Super Bonk (1994)

Most video games have a plot. This one doesn`t. You are some caveman baby that whacks stuff with his head until you transform into some dinosaur or a robot thing.

He`s mad because he found out how moronic his game really is.

Toilet Kids (Whenever)

You are in a spaceship, shooting mysterious objects. Only, those objects are poop. And you`re in a spaceship in a toilet.
Please, never make me play this again.

The Muppet Show (80`s or 90`s)

I took pictures of this a long time ago, intending to put them here. Now is the time. This game ruined the perfectly awes-mazing series with bad graphics and stupid levels.
Unfortunately, Blogger is being stupid and the pictures aren`t working.